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Back to doctor…..

I went to my gynaecologist  showed her the reports …she said I also noticed the same things your babby if given a birth will be dwarf  so better go for abortion I was scattered, what are you saying doctor i won’t do that just because he/she would be different  from others 😦 I have started talking  with babby feeling the presence of  babby I won’t and I left her hospital crying…..

I Started visiting hospitals and meeting all doctors so that atleast one can give  me a hope and tell me don’t abort but invain😢.because I was crying the whole day my father and mother told me to stay back at home and now they started visiting hospitals and clinics.I use to call them every minute  and ask them what did doctor say they use to tell me you don’t  worry ,but listening  to their voice I use to understand …….

But I was very clear in my mind I won’t abort my child, for me it was like killing 😔.

Just as my 7th month started i went to fernandes hospital  and met a doctor…from 4 to 5 days I was  dying to hear DO NOT ABORT YOUR CHILD  and  atlast i heared  that  I felt  so relaxed but not happy the doctor told me  we will scan and watever is babbys condition  ,will not abort because it’s against ethics of our hospital we don’t kill.

I started accepting the fact that my babby will be dwarf  and started preparing myself  to be strong  enough so that if required I can speak for my babby and stand for the rights of my babby. But I had to gather more courage💪 after the scan🙇 I had to be stronger  or say strongest never ever in my wild dreams I thought this😲

Thanatophric dwarfism……death bearing left me alive.

My first pregnancy  very happy 😊excited😀 nerous 😯 and scared,all mixed feelings  experienced  it first time…

I  enjoyed  the attention,care,don’t do this that etc etc… then started to enjoy movements of baby it was so lovely ☺   i really thought “yes it’s true every feeling  can’t be described  in words it’s just felt”.

Sometimes  I dreamt  of holding a babby, sometimes  started to make a list of names(boys&girls), sometimes thought of doing shopping etc  this is in 2010.

One day I went  to hospital for a regular check up my doctor said though you are in last week  of 6th month but your tummy looks big I think  you should go for a scan immediately. I went to scan immediately  and when my turn came for scan I went inside  she started to see and then she called her students and started to show them my babby .I really got confused  and I asked the scan doctor is everything  fine  she said go to your doctor i am giving you the reports. After waiting nervously for 10mins I got the report as I opened it….I was so shocked ,scattered,could not believe my eyes and I thought for a second  why did the hell i studied genetics  when  i read THANATOPHORIC DWARFISM.😢😢😢

 

Though its wasnt difficult at all but Struggled hard to get into blogging.

Feels sad ysr of marriage  getting buzzy with kid or say pregnancies makes you forget the hardwork and money which parents put inn for getting you into your own favourite subject.the eagerness to do  masters in geneticsand then passing with distiction made me felt great and now it’s just opposite feeling as I struggled for getting in blogging.

Having a MSc certificate in my hand from past 9 years and just  being a simple housewife  makes me feel happy and satisfied sometimes PEOPLE makes me loose myself  coz I didn’t  earn money .

Is it so important to earn MONEY ????